CanonFiction
by Iris Musicia
Summary: On a webquest, Kitty discovers FanFiction, and some of its darker authors as Kurt discovers the cure:  CanonFiction, home of the canon characters' revenge on the fans!  Kurtty


**D:WIO**

**Haaaaah, sigh. I have no idea what to write, yet here I am writing. Ooh, joy, plotless oneshot! Actually, no, I think I'll write a story I've been meaning to get out for a while, but could never figure the plot out. I guess I'll wing it and you guys (counting on you, FankandJoe3 and 100 Silver Wings!) will help me with this. It has potential (or at least I think so). **

**-Wait, before I begin, I have to say that in addition to not having the computer during the week (I stole some time from my sis, who's not here right now), I probably won't have it on some Saturdays, because I'm on the Debate Team (call me a nerd, but I pride myself on knowing that I'm sufficiently smarter than the average amoeba), and we go to debates on Saturdays. Anyhoo, happy reading!**

The moment you become aware of something, it lashes out. Like finding a wolf in the woods you've walked past a million times, but the second you look at it, _bam_, it nails you. Forces of nature apply to this rule, and websites are certainly no exception. And one website's more aggressive than most: FanFiction.

When an innocent Google search becomes deadly, some people close the window and walk away, shaken. Not Kitty Pryde. She charges straight into Google with the "lucky" button on and slays the beast where it stands. When she came up against FanFiction, though, armed with only her mouse and keyboard, she was tempted to run and hide.

But she didn't. She bravely dove into the archives, exploring every category, a new one every day, until the website would lie explored and withered, at her feet. It took her two weeks to get to the "X" archives. And when she got there, it was no different, and she jumped in headfirst.

X-Men: Evolution flashed up on her screen, and she unwittingly walked into the wolves' den.

Did Kitty know she was a character in a cartoon? Perhaps. If she did, she showed no hesitation in riding the tsunamis of the XME archives, that is, until a certain fuzzy German teleported in on her surfboard. Then they went under. Hard.

_Bamf_!

"Hey, Keety, vatcha doin'?" Kurt asked, leaning over her shoulder and peering at the screen.

"Slaying a monster," she said absently, clicking into another link, delving deeper into danger.

"Oh! Zis is FanFiction, ja? A Freundin of mine vrites for zis!" Kurt said excitedly.

"What sort of stuff does she write?" Kitty replied, stopping her search for a moment and turning in her chair to face Kurt.

"Ehm, I zink she called it "Loro"—a pairing betveen Logan and Storm." Kurt said, taking control of the mouse with his tail and searching. "Ja, here she is. _Betveen Adamantium and Lightning_."

"Erk. Don't let Logan see that. Ooh, I just got a good idea," Kitty said devilishly, gently pushing Kurt's tail off the mouse and setting up the parameters of a search. She muttered under her breath as she selected options that made Kurt's eyes grow to the size of teacups.

"_Vas?_ Nein! Nichts! Gib mir den—just give me ze mouse!" Kurt snatched for the mouse, but Kitty held it out of reach, laughing at how purple Kurt's cheeks had become. She phased a finger though the mouse and fried it, now using the keyboard to navigate.

"Oh, isn't that cute? They call that Kietro! And look at this, _Kodd!_ Over here's there's Logurt . . . and what else? Kurmanda, of course," Kitty pressed another sequence of keys, smiling deviously, but as she navigated to the next page, the smile fell off her face and her fingers went dead on the keys. Kurt had also frozen in shock.

Kitty came to and slammed her finger down on the backspace key rapidly. Kurt snapped out of it and twisted Kitty's swivel chair around so she was facing him.

"Neizzer of us just saw zat." He growled, and Kitty shook her head fervently. "Neizzer of us vill talk about zat." Kitty shook her head again. "Good."

As Kurt released the chair, Kitty stared for another moment before smiling slightly.

"The name's cute . . . I mean, it's just so . . . cute, like a little fluffy thing—"

"Don't!" Kurt snapped.

"Fine then! You can go take your bossyboots German butt and teleport it somewhere else. I don't want you in this room!" Kitty said sharply, and Kurt glowered at her before disappearing in a cloud of smoke that made Kitty's eyes water.

She continued to grumble as she pressed the keys that would take her forward, and allowed herself a smile as she saw the page again.

_Kurtty._

**Ha ha, yeah. Potential? Thoughts on the plot? The title's up for changing too, if you have suggestions. **


End file.
